About the Coaching Circle with Mel
I’m excited to announce that registration for my coaching circle is open!
If you’re all in and don’t need to think twice, go grab your spot here. Yeay!
If you’re wondering or hesitating or unsure on the opportunity, keep reading. (And yeay! I appreciate this too.)
The most honest thing I can say about this coaching circle is that it works if the women who participate work it. That is, women who are willing to ask questions, get curious, own what isn’t working and commit to taking action will get so much out of this coaching space. A coaching circle requires openness.
I’m excited about this coaching circle because it reminds me of my oceanside Breakthrough & Begin retreats, and it’s where I do my best coaching. I love small-group work because it allows me to coach one-on-one but bring more women into the process. And, it scaffolds. We’ll build the container together — the space we create will reflect the collective voice of the women. It’s powerful.
If you’re stuck, there’s a good chance you’re the reason why. There are patterns, fears and long-held beliefs that you’ve decided are true, and you’ve stacked them in your path to trick yourself into thinking that progress and growth isn’t possible. I can’t stress this enough — your openness to asking questions is everything.
If you’re wondering about what this coaching circle is, it’s very much like it sounds. We’ll gather twice a month, and women will bring forward their questions, blocks, challenges and progress, and I’ll coach you through them. The woman I’m directly working with will receive a ton of value, but there will be equal value to the women in the circle listening and observing. (And it will lead to some of your greatest breakthroughs, promise.)
But also, I want to make sure you know what this coaching circle is NOT. The last thing I’d want to do is for you to think one thing and experience another!
This circle is not:
A quick-fix session. I can’t solve your challenges or give you permission, but I promise to ask the questions you need to hear and create a safe and trusted space for you to work through them.
A one-on-one coaching session. This is a shared space. This means you share the mic, the time, the energy. There will be some sessions where you’re a listener, and that’s it. There will be some sessions where your question guides more conversation and breakthroughs for other women.
Your opportunity to save other women. I will establish this early on, but I’m very clear in my retreats that we don’t save each other. When you try to minimize the pain, grief or struggle of another woman, you deny her the opportunity to feel it all. We need to feel it all. As a participant, I will welcome you to validate, echo and thank women for sharing, but I’m releasing you from the expectation (and habit) of saving each other and providing feedback. If you are a ‘fixer’ or ‘saver,’ this will be such a welcomed challenge for you!
A known outcome. Here’s what I know in my bones — you are likely saying yes to this coaching circle for one reason, and you’re going to realize you needed it for another. It happens ALL the time at my retreats. Women come in with an acute pain or challenge or dream, and once you dig into the coaching work, you realize all the other layers and stories that are folded into it. I often call this ‘pulling the thread’ and this is where I shine in my coaching. I will help you connect the dots. I will help you see how a pattern you picked up as a young girl is affecting your decisions as a woman. I will help you see how fear is holding you back or keeping you safe. I will help you see how a refusal to step into your worth is perhaps tied to never being loved or appreciated the way you needed. Your job is being brave enough to pull the thread and then letting go of control of where that takes you.
A gossip circle. Trust is everything, and whatever is discussed in the circle stays in the circle. We always think we know someone, but in reality, we only know the version they’ve been willing to share with us. Hear me — we are all performing. Even me, I’m performing. The goal is to lay down as much armor as possible and allow your truest self, story and dreams to be set free. Our group is a trusted space where women can lay down their shit, sort it out and know they are safe in doing so.
A judgment zone. This is a big one, and I’m going to let you in on a little secret. When (not if) you judge a woman in our coaching circle, it’s important to know that it actually has nothing to do with her and EVERYTHING to do with you. When you feel judgment coming up and you want to project that OUT at the woman who is sharing, I kindly ask that you direct your judgment IN. The woman you are judging the most is likely your greatest opportunity for growth and inner work.
Okay, you’re still here! Yeay! Now I’m going to let you in on what this coaching circle is and what my goals for these next three months are.
A place to breathe and surrender. My guess is there is an identity that you are known for, and sometimes, even though we may love the roles, responsibilities and connections that identity brings us, it can also feel hard, outdated and even suffocating. I don’t want you to bring ‘what’ you are into this coaching circle, I want you to bring who you are. At my retreats, I will sometimes joke with women that we all need a space where they can say, “I have no f#cking idea.”
An opportunity to ask questions without judgment or consequence. This is really important. All of the power, authority, relationships and positions we hold don’t allow us the safety to pause and ask questions. Is this working? Does this feel good? Do I like who I am in this space? How far away am I from my values? Why am I so tired? Who am I trying to impress? Why does this matter? Is this the direction I want to go in? Successful and accomplished women don’t have these spaces nearly as much as they need. This is mostly due to the ‘Well, I asked for this life, so I should just be quiet and make it work’ complex. Not in this coaching circle! Questions are everything.
A space for growth. Think of yourself as both deepening your roots and growing your branches. A lot of my coaching revolves around your values and how we make decisions based on what we say deeply matters to us. This is deepening your roots. Then, as we grow stronger in who we are and what we want, we start growing and being brave with our actions.
A community to build your runway. If you’ve started going through my goal-setting workbook, then you know how I feel about building your runway. That is, the detailed way you will take action and the people and resources you need along the way. As we move through our sessions, we’ll continually come back to the concept of our runway. What does it need for you to take action? Who do you need to bring on as a cheerleader or supporter? What conversations do you need to have to get you more ready for a little leap?
Also — this is the one area where I will allow feedback! As we talk about our runways, and YOU have the expertise or connection to help another woman, I welcome and encourage you to let her know. “I can help with that” and “I know someone who can help you with that” are powerful ways we’ll help each other.
The last thing I’ll add is this — I’d love to see you in this space. In all the years of coaching and hosting retreats, I’m always amazed at how the right women always show up. If you’re tired of going it alone and if you want to plug into a good energy source these next few months while you chase a dream or goal or just need support, this is such a powerful way to do it.
This is my favorite way to serve, and as I get older and my time gets more precious, I feel like it’s the most impactful and important way for me to use my gifts. I’m hopeful that if you are able, you’ll join me.