🙌🏻Take a healthy risk. 🙌🏻
This was the lesson I received from Alexis’s middle school orientation last night.
“We want them taking healthy risks. This is the time in their life when they need to try new things and put themselves out there a bit.”
I’m sure he and the other teachers said many other useful things that I should have been writing down, but all I could focus on were these words that both captivated and calmed me.
So this is what I wrote down:
My 6th grade mama job – encourage healthy risks.
Okay. Got it. I can do this.
Also me: Gets in car after meeting and immediately Googles ‘what is a healthy risk.’ 😬🤣🤔
Turns out my job next year is to simply be there while Alexis makes decisions and figures out her own boundaries and identity. I’m also not supposed to impose my beliefs or opinions upon her because apparently (yes, insert heavy sarcasm and air quotes) I need to step back and let her fail, feel uncomfortable and take risks on her own. And apparently (yup, more sarcasm) the more I intervene the more she’ll pull back and the less likely she’ll share with me. 🙄🙄🙄
Healthy risks are going to give me an ulcer.
I kept researching and reading and one thing is clear: the more kids observe their parents and adult role models taking healthy risks, the more they will learn, be brave and model that behavior.
HA! I’m not kidding – when I read this I felt like I had found the sneaky back door to still control – I mean be a part of – the GAME! #putmeincoach
But of course it makes sense.
When our kids see us constantly stepping out of our comfort zones and doing new and brave things, they aren’t just paying attention to whether we fail or succeed – they are watching us attempt.
They’re watching you go for the dream job, and get it. They’re watching you go for the dream job, and not get it.
They’re watching you go for the gutsy PR, and reach it. They’re watching you go for the gutsy PR, and not reach it.
But most importantly, they’re just watching you GO FOR IT.
That’s all I have to do.
That’s all YOU have to do.
Especially when we feel helpless, right? We just keep mirroring back to them the kind of life we want them to live. We just keep showing up in the hard moments and conversations we don’t want them to run from. And we keep making choices aligned with our values so they understand what fulfillment should look and FEEL like.
We just have to keep going for the things we love and showing them all different sides of brave choices.
Learning from losses.
Choosing courage over comfort. (Go Brené!)
So, I made a healthy risk today. I signed up for an 8-week intensive writing program. If I want to get better at writing, this is a great opportunity. I’m nervous but really excited.
It also felt really good to take a healthy risk. This course was a big investment, and it will be a huge time commitment. The worst that can happen is I’ll be very uncomfortable, pushed into new creative depths and feel clumsy within my craft. I can handle that!
Okay. Your turn. 🙌🏻
This is my loving nudge and ask: get out there and take a healthy risk. Be a little bit braver in something. Say yes to something that stretches you a bit. Volunteer for something new. Try something different. Sign-up for something that interests you. Then report back and let me know how it goes.
Also, if there’s any other mamas out there in ‘healthy risk land’ please make yourselves known. I feel like this needs to be a team effort. I need other moms I can text without judgment and just type: I WANT TO CONTROL EVERYTHING. 😂😂😂